Becoming Mrs Maria Umer....

*and i am dedicating this post to you SJ *

my chacha *who was my wakeel* asked:
'Maria Shaffaq Malik kia apko Muhammaed Umer Salim se Nikkah qabool hai? '
i was shivering....was so nervous and confuse..was experiencing vigorous palpitation...the concerns for the new life...new family...n him...there were hundreds of thoughts in my mind at that moment yet was numb enough to focus on a single thing...
and i nodded my head and answered with the trembling tone  'Qabool hai...' 
chacha asked again..
'Maria Shaffaq Malik kia apko Muhammaed Umer Salim se Nikkah qabool hai? 'i replied:
 'Qabool hai...' and for the last and final time, he asked:
'Maria Shaffaq Malik kia apko Muhammaed Umer Salim se Nikkah qabool hai? '
and for once n for al i said:
 'Qabool hai!! '

and i was declared as wife of Muhammad Umer Salim...
but doing that sign on Nikkahnama and saying this Qabool hai are not the signs of owning this title...
being declared as Mrs Maria Umer and becoming Mrs Maria Umer is entirely different...
how?
let me tell u..
becoming Mrs Maria Umer is my story...little yet life changing journey..

the day i was informed about ur proposal, i was told that 'He is a sober, religious and nice person'..
then after my parents get back from his place..they have a very positive opinion about him..
it was:
'Beta that guy is more like one who cares for family. for her sisters. seems pretty decent and is into religion as well. we found him overall good but the decision is totally up to u. if u want to meet or talk before deciding anything u can n be sure ur decision will be the final thing. no pressure nothing. '
and right then after 5 days he came to meet me..
and that was the first time i felt maybe we're supposed to meet one two or a few wrong people before meeting the right one so when we finally meet the right one, we'll know how to be grateful for it...
till today i haven't said it SJ...But at the verge of ending this year and beginning a new one with u, i would like to say it all that i might not be able to say right in front of u..
u knw SJ...at the very first glimpse..the thing that caught my eyes was the mehraab of sujood at ur forehead...right above ur kind eyes...i've always heard true beauty cannot be seen but found within the soul...and i can say that yes SJ i looked deep into ur soul..it's the soul behind the eyes...ur eyes..ur kind eyes..beautified by the glorious sign of sujood...do i need any other sign of ur beauty? No m not sinister to call it a mark coz for me its a glorious gift by Allah to His followers..the pious ones :) ...it was over whelming SJ..
and ur soft healing tone...something new, something sweet...that was lifting me off my feet..
and ur soft healing tone...something new, something sweet...that was lifting me off my feet..
i told you that my past has darkness...i dont have regrets but u should be aware of it...and the way u responded...with kindness, love, care n concern...it reflects the pureness of ur soul SJ..and i never had felt that much peace in my heart...
and from Qabool hai till this moment..many things have changed..
right in the middle of most chaotic phase...u relived me SJ...ur kind eyes...ur soothing words...thy acted like a magical ointment...and i felt live again...
SJ u made me believe there is someone waiting to show, how true love is meant to go. Willing to fight for me & hold on tight...and never let me fall prey of this cruel world..who know how to love me, respect me and treat me right...
u're like the ocean SJ..pretty enough on the surface, but when one dive down into ur depths thy'll find beauty most people never see..and i count myself in those few lucky ones who actually made it there :)
some people have such a beautiful spirit...like urs..
you changed my mind..my heart..that was so scared of implanting seeds of love again..but made me believe in the beauty of a pure soul, a pure heart and a pure love that is putted in by Allah SWT Himself...
and now whenever i think about u, I can't help but smile *blush*
and when I smile, people think I've done something wrong or am up to something lol :P Life is funny that way..credit goes to u ;)
and while being with u when I see ur smile it makes me smile... :) especially when i know i m the one that put it there :) *i guess*
and SJ my heart know it very well,
that right now this new relation may be "something" but I can see it becoming "everything" very soon <3 In sha Allah :)
and I do know that, each day, you mean a little bit more to me.. more mine than before...
I will be forever grateful to Allah SWT for choosing me to become Mrs Maria Umer..
being wife of the one with the love for her that shines from his heart n for the beautiful glow of his soul which dignifies how loving n humble person my SJ is... :)
*proud and contended*
May Allah keep us en-wrapped in His blessings..today n every coming day..ameen :)

and YOUR name is written on my hands today!!

'whats his name?'
this was the third time she asked me...
why are u asking me? is it required?
she replied..
'Yes! we put the groom's name on the bride's hand to let them feel that Allah SWT have connected the lines in their hands  and from now and on they will always be joined by the fate...In sha Allah'
i smiled back..
she looked at me n said..'sada suhagan raho'
i laughed and said..
'there are 2 days left'
she smiled with the eyes filled with motherly love and whispered in my ears..
'joray aasmaanon per banty hain..or tmhara ban gya hai..tm usky leay or wo tmhary leay likh dia gya hai..or ye looh e mehfooz main safe hai..'
i keep on looking at her with the amused expressions but a revealing frame of mind..
more like state of realization..
What do you think my chances were, of finding a destined soul mate in the group of so many people?
all with reflected goodness and human-being-ness but not the soul destined to fit with mine?
to make harmony with my heartbeats?
and i used to think, I'll be lucky if I can just find someone who'll be able to stand me for the rest of 'our' lives....
What if I've already told the other part of persona and the true-self is beneath the layers of soberness and seriousness.. because I was relying on some sort of spark I didn't feel earlier...
and now..
It suddenly made sense...
only once in my entire life I've felt this inexplicable,
 almost mystical and unpredictable feeling....
and i thought it remarkable, to have found last lost piece of the puzzle,
when in my heart I'd always believed there were only reflections of that one precious piece out there for me..but not the last lost yet the one dreamed for..
when its from destiny, made above the sky...it embraces ur heart with the pure feelings of contentment and serenity...
that perception of fulfilment and sense of gratification is poured in ur blood by Allah SWT..
yes i can feel it flowing with my blood..My heart had been wrong...I'm not alone at all..There was not only one but two...
and i know now, thats YOU!!

Meet MSM :D

I'm a bubbly person who sees life as a venue for having fun, to live it all up and to be reckless without worries. To be free and fun-loving, optimistic and feel blessed everyday of life 'coz we're alive and we have the chance to enjoy all that it has to offer.

I make friends super-easily, but then you guys already know that! :P

I love hanging out with my friends and gossiping about things and oh! I LOVE SHOCKING PEOPLE! :D
You ain't gonna find anybody who can give you a shocker within seconds of meeting ya ;)
I'm a cracked nut. I just happen to be loud and boisterous at times. (most of those times tend to last long with uncontrollable and annoyingly-unbearable-stomach-ache-inducing fits of laughter with my best friends =D. MAYNNN! You just gotta love your besties!)
Amazingly, I'm soft-spoken and a gentle person to balance it.
*Confusing, I know xD*

I'm hell naughty and mischievous, but then again, I'm a just ME, so yeah, everything goes, doesn't it? =D

I'm curious about everything and I mean EVERYTHING. There's nothing
I'm not intrigued with. I love getting to know new things.

I love being productive, so you're all gonna find me always busy doing different things. Buzzzzzz!

I happen to be everybody's best pal. And I almost always have a solution to everyone's problems, except mine =\


I love trying out new things. Anything that's a bit risky, or seems intriguing .... You got the green light to count me in!

I live to devour books. I'm a book junkie (literally =\)
I.Love.Books.
Gimme anything and I'm going to sit down right there and not get up until I've finished it.

I love chilling with my buddies and my family. Can't get enough of 'em! Love you guys to bits ^_^ ♥

Umm... I'm randomly random. Prone to mood swings. A drama queen when I wanna be. Friendly from the top of my head to the tips of my multicoloured (oh-so-cute-at-the-moment) socks!

I love English movies. Hate the cliche Indian ones though.
I like to think I have a constantly evolving musical taste. I love Music. Dunno what I'd do without it!

I'm a bossy maniac at times. I.need.perfection. Or as close to perfection as can be. Nothing less. The best out of everyone.

And yeah, i almost NEVER get into trouble at school or anywhere ... *grins toothedly*
'Coz I got the face of an angel and everybody gotta love me ;) ♥
So I'm an angel with horns (to keep my heavy goodness halo up)

So that's about enough of an intro, I guess.
Talk to ya soon.
And yeah, GET OFF MA PROFILE YOU STALKER(which you gotta be, 'coz you still reading ma info)! :P

P.S. Did I mention I'm hyper? xD

A DAD’S SPEECH AT HIS DAUGHTER’S WEDDING

Dear son-in-Law,

I thought I would start my speech by addressing you as the “new” family of my daughter. But I think it would be inappropriate because now that she is married, you are “the family” for her. Believe me; I don’t have a problem with that. I, in fact, want my daughter to have “you” as her priority now. Its time for us to take a backseat in her life. We would happily accept it but would surely request one thing- please keep her happy!

I am more than sure that you will keep her very happy. She will perhaps be happier than what she used to be here. But like all fathers, I obsess over my daughter’s happiness which is making me say this over and over again- please keep her happy!

She never was and will never be a burden for me. She is in fact the reason why I breathe and smile. I am getting her married because this is what the law of nature demands. I am helpless in the face of our culture and therefore sending her to your home. She was the happiness of my home and will now light up your home. I am giving my world to you. Please make sure it remains beautiful. I am giving away my princess to you. Please make sure she stays as a queen. I have raised her with my sweat and blood and now she is wonderfully perfect. For all the care, love, beauty and warmth my daughter will bring into your lives, I just want her happiness in return—please keep her happy!

If at times you think that my daughter has said or done something wrong, feel free to scold her. But handle her with love. She is very fragile. If at times she feels low, be with her. She just needs a little bit of your attention. If at times she feels sick, show her some care. It’s the medicine that works best for her. If at times she fails to fulfill a responsibility, feel free to chastise her. But empathize with her. She is still learning. Do understand her—please keep her happy!

I don’t mind if I don’t get to see her for months. I don’t mind if I am not able to talk to her on a daily basis. I would be more than happy if she doesn’t remember me much. But, my only motive in life has been my daughter’s happiness which is now in your hands. I beg you, please keep her happy.

Dear son-in-law, these words may not mean much to you now but if you are lucky enough to father a daughter someday, you will appreciate them better when you will find every beat of your heart shouting – “please keep her happy”!

-- Dedicated to all fathers

*courtesy: Anonymous*

~ ba'naam e yaar ~

Tarz e Mukhatib e Yaar ki, ab guftugu hum kia kren,
Jee main hai k aj kal, bus unko he socha kren..

pur-shooq se nazroon ki un gehraiyoon main doob kr,
jhilmilaty aqs per bus khud ko he dekha kren..

deed ko dildaar k hum intezaar krty hain,
ae nazar jo yaar tou nazrain meri sajda kren..

Jaan k anjaan ban'na shaan e beniyazi se,
is ada e yaar per hum or bhi tarpa kren..

Mujh ko mujh se cheenti, jadoo bhari awaz se,
naam o nishaan janab ka, her waqt he pocha kren..

kbhi tou katay na katay, waqt e tamana e wisaal,
or kbhi tou hijr kou, hum aap he tarsa kren!!

~MSM~

~ Mera Khuwaab ~

I used to write poems..*few years back*..and today i'm feeling the urge to write again..

Ae kaash aesa ho k sitaroon ka jahan ho,
Mohabbat k undekhy hisaaron ka jahn ho..

Chahat k, Ulfat k guloon se banay chaman,
bheeni see mehkii see baharoon ka jahan ho..

Nafrat ka koi jhonka na guzar pae udher se,
Sulagtii hue qurbat k hararoon ka jahan ho..

Chalty chalty yun hi barhta jae kaarwaan,
Apnon k, Pyaroon k saharoon ka jahan ho!!


~MSM~

piece for friends :) - 10th Nov 2013

Today is one of the beautiful day 
and for me its more beautiful as my dear ones are celebrating the newest yet happiest phase of their life...
Seeing two of my girlfriends Hajra and Sweett Doll cheerishing the one year anniversory of their cinderella wedding at one end made me contended whereas on the other end the unlocking of the most enchanting phase of life 'being engaged' of my chotu sa bhai Anas Ansari left a big ear to ear smile on my face 
And i look around seeing people tieing new ties...falling in love...making new promises...celebrating the success of their love...make me wonder that people always fall in love with the most perfect aspects of each other’s personalities. Who wouldn’t?
Anybody can love the most wonderful parts of another person...
But what i feel is that’s not the clever trick...
The really clever trick is this: Can you accept the flaws?
Can you look at your partner’s faults honestly and say, ‘I can work around that. I can make something out of it.’?
Because the good stuff is always going to be there, and it’s always going to pretty and sparkly, but the crap underneath can ruin you...
As Einstein said:
'Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.'
and that is something i wish you to be aware of....
to avoid...
to prevent..
Just look at the positive sides 
and i know you all are already blessed  so why not to always, yes i mean always, seek the radiant sides of your partner..
So that I will be as happy as i'm now in congratulating you all on the celebration of your love even after 100 of years 
and i conclude my love, prayers and heartiest wishes for you in the words of Khalil jibran...
'Let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow...'
May Allah SWT bless you all with a blessed life, embrace you with happiness and bestow you with His heavely bounties...Forever 

a piece written on Picnic 14th Nov 2013

had a memorible day yestersday....
who says its fun, only, when you're out with friends n homies?
if u believe it...
thn let me tell u..
my reply to this is a big NO!!
and i can say this coz i've experienced it 
and credit goes to myry 'DAD ka GANG  '
Thanks Ansar Haider Malik, my dad, for introducing us to these awesome people *since our childhood so tht we can know abt urs too  *
Thanks Arshad uncle  for being so friendly *and tht too since i know u i mean mera bachpan  * so fun-loving and yes ao adorable  *m proud to have u  as my uncle n i mean it* by the way ur dance moves r ek dam perfect  and thank you Romana anty for being so sober and sweet all the time 
Thanks Abid uncle...for being one of the 'mehfil ki jaan'  we always enjoy ur vocal magics n lovvveeeeee to see ur exceptional expressional skills all the time  and Romana anty i loveeeee ur 'hazir jawabi'  it always make us laugh out loud love u...thanks for being there 
Thanks Shams uncle...for giving those subtle yet outstanding cliches in the convos  its a treat to have u around  and Sultana anty for being an awesome fun and love bunlde  yesterday, today and i know for every coming day  n wesay bhi u to meri friend hain na 
Thanks Iftikhar uncle and waheeda anty for always being so soberly nice and being a living example of what elder's love is  special thanks and love for maa jii 
aahhh and it is making me senti...but you all worth it...completely 
Thank you for giving a whole new meaning to fun...
for bringing such love into my life and giving me a never ending joy....
thank you for loving me and receiving my love in return 
Thank you for the memories I will cherish forever *and know rest of us will too*...
But most of all, thank you for showing me that there will come a time when I can be proud and will be able to say;
'Yes i'm not only blessed with a lovely family but also with the best uncles in the world  who are as dear to me ab my dad  and i wish i will have them all my life *In sha Allah*  '
May Allah SWT bless us all...always like this...and even more 
ameennn
and rest of the bacha party  u all r fun *and i mean it*  
P.S:
Shoujat and Sumera u both were truly missed  

Shahana Jora - The RED bridal suit

Two days back i was out for shopping for my Big day when i noticed this long existed tradition..
focus on Red color as Bridal Wear..
*yes i noticed it now..any masla with this late observation?*
so i looked for the reasons for choosing Red as bridal color code..
and i come up with these interesting *and funny for me :P * facts regarding color psychology..
or the impression thy leave on the viewers..
i'm sharing those facts here..
but with wht i *my mind basically* feel for the facts :D ... lets abbreviate RBW for Red Bridal Wear :D ..

1. It has personal associations..
MSM view: i found this one logical for RBW zahir hai ab dulhan public association tou hony se rhi :D

2. Recognized as stimulant..its is inherently exciting for the viewers and the amount of red is directly related to the amount of energy perceived..
MSM view: this is explicit content so no comments on this or PEMRA will block my blog lol :P

3. Red draws attention and focus the viewers on object in red..
MSM view: now this makes sense :D after al its the big day for the bride and who dn't want to have full attention n focus ;)

4. It increases enthusiasm of carrier and receptors..
MSM view: umm enthusiasm means josh...n josh main hosh khona or stage se lurak jana is not wisdom :D so a side effect for me :D

5. As stimulant of energy it increases blood pressure, respiration, heartbeat and pulse rate..
MSM view: hahahahhahaha and all those times we refer it as groom's nervousness and shyness :D so from now n on blame red for making groom sweat not the dulhan :D

6. Encourages action, boldness and confidence of carrier..
MSM view: okay folks..if u found a bride confident and bold *like me i guess* don't label her confidence as BE-SHARAMI and her boldness as BE-HUDGI -_- its the red color of the dress which is responsible for such attitude not the bride herself :D

Well i guess its pretty enough on red :D
i wish i will NOT be portraying all the character traits of Red in its true means and will be a traditional bride coz its my belief tht miracle happens :P
Wish me luck with it and prayers for all the receptors :P
*or ye main apna shahana jora pehn kr looking for final look*

~ Regret Vs Reward ~

....
another atempt to clear oneself..
does it really matter?
NO...not at all...
she really don't know what's wrong with them...
But she do know one thing for sure...
That no matter how much one hurt her or how badly one will spoil the truth...
either to balance the disrupted voices...
to justify the alarms and reality checks by one's own aura..
or to calm the noise inside em down..
she's sure...
tht she can never...never ever..fell down to meet those shallow standards...
coz Allah SWT has blessed her with a reward already..
reward for all her patience..
her diligence...
her persistence...
and composure...
so why she won't be thankful to ones who let it happen?
she truly is grateful to the ones for their participation..
and input in al possible ways..
and thus in return of such favors...lifetime favors indeed...
all she can do is...
to make Dua for the goodness and well-being of all the direct and indirect contributors..
and to look ahead of her with a gratified mind..
with a satisfied smile on her face...
devenomized fresh blood circulating in her rejuvenated body,,
making her cheeks flushed as a proof of existence of new life..
and a whole new heart ready to fall in love again!!

~ December is Destiny ~

December... <3
just a month back if someone have asked me what December is?
i would've laughed and replied a month like other but a bit colder..
but its hard to accept that how in few days December has taken a whole new meaning in my life...
It is not just a word...or a random month now..
but a whole phenomena of living....
now...for me...
December is Deep...
deluging the soul from the diming dilemma to the dimensional displacements...
or in a lay men lingo; the state of forgetting ur last stop and looking ahead to other without stopping..
December..doubtlessly...is Devotional...a diversion from Deceptive to the Devout...with all devotion and dignity...
December is Daring..
one dead end.. yet the one to end with beginning of other...
desire to leave our comfort zones and go beyond limits...
December is Didactic...
its dexterous ways to demonstrate the divulgence of cryptic Divine will...
December is a delightful Dream...
developing a desirous doting of Debonair without being discreet...
and thus i can narrate;
DECEMBER IS MY DESTINY!!

and the struggle begin against ur own protector!!

Booking the Venue.. CHECK!

Arrangement for the Caterer.. CHECK!
Makeover.. CHECK!
Dress selection.. CHECK!
Invitations.. CHECK!
Calling Qazi Sahab.. CHECK!
Nikkahnamma review.. NEVER DONE!!!
It’s hard to overstate the importance of this seemingly simple two-page document that requires as little as the testimony of two witnesses and the consent of the couple. At the very least, the nikahnama deserves some contemplation on your part, and an effort to gain a basic understanding of what all the clauses it contains entail....
so i was looking for my responsibilities and roles, in accordance with Islam, for my new life when i came across the portion of my rights that can be quoted on nikkahnama, which were neglected and over-looked on purpose...
purpose of image consciousness...purpose of 'duniya kia kahey gii'...
purpose of 'inlaws kia sochengy'...
but for me..
its not about greed...not about image...not about being cunning...surely its not...
but its more about availing my rights while performing my duties and working on responsibilities with the fear of Allah in my heart...
I always wanted to fill it myself in consent with my to be groom...coz Shariah allows me to do it...
and if anyone fears that i will abuse it...tou i can only request to be considerate...if i fear Allah and follow Shariah in this regard then i will fulfill my responsibilities and duties with even more fear of being convict of not doing em properly...
Its more about trusting me with my intentions towards my demand of rights provided i am trusting the other person and family with my life..if one cannot trust on my intentions and can misjudge it with greed then how can expect me to judge his intentions as care instead of lust...simple as that..demand of rights and their approval involve humility not humiliation...
but again culture have an upper hand over Shariah..and that is saddening!!
when i stood up against useless expenses to be made on Nikkah ceremony, got scolded and made to sit coz of the cultural n social fears of being accused is was somehow understandable.. but when it came to my islamic and legal rights i was again scolded and made to sit for the same reason...and this is not legitimate to me...
more resistance than that i had faced for my decision for taking Hijaab *sigh*
DISAPPOINTMENT AT ITS PEAK!!
Apart from the right of taking 'khulla' (divorce) on certain conditions like if abused or beaten up and the issues of Haq meher there are other rights we can claim too that are given to us by Shariah as well...
There are clauses and documents you can even attach to the nikahnama. You may set an amount of money that you want from your husband as allowance every month. This could be any amount decided between you and your prospective husband. Interestingly, the girl may challenge in court years down the line that the allowance spelled out in the nikahnama is not sufficient to meet her expenses and be revised keeping in mind inflation and her growing needs. Some people go as far as to include a clause that in the case of a separation or divorce the husband will pay her a certain sum of money, or a clause regarding who is going to get the custody of children if there is a breakup. So long as the documents do not run contrary to law, such clauses are acceptable in the court.
The nikahnama is one of the few things that are left to the last minute, when there is hardly enough time for the girl to deliberate over it – even though it is the one document that ensures your marital rights...
Hence, all i wanted was would be to take charge, read it and fill it myself...
To be aware of what rights i have, and able to ask for what is rightly mine....
But alas...no luck..
Its all right..and true...the predictions are true...that there will come a time when ummah will fear more for society than Allah...and implementing Islam and Shariah in one's life will be so challenging..
And now i'm sitting aside...knowing that bringing up this topic again will be troublesome..and will not be appreciated by my own protecters...
all i can do now is to promise myself that i will not let my son to go for cultural norm but Shariah!!
and i wish my WALI didn't get caught up in culture!
*sigh*

[photo courtesy: The Express Tribune, Ms T, July 8^th, 2012.]

P.S:
This issue was shared over a feminine forum (screen shot shared) and i was so depress when i came to know I'm not alone in this...its not about judging intentions as greed or rights to exercise autocracy but to avail the opportunities that Allah SWT have grant us...I pray Allah to make me capable of giving my son the strength to stand with Shariah and not letting this happen with my daughter-in-law to be...ameen

Being FAT is being BLESSED :P

Channel 1: *screen show sofia vergara* Nothing Refreshes Like A Diet Pepsi
*NEXT*
Channel 2: Ramp walk of some anorexic zero size models showcasing clothing at a brand launch like a suit on a hanger
*NEXT*
Channel 3: BBC food broadcasting 'Hairy Dieters'
*NEXT*
Channel 4: Broadcasting old episodes of Jackie Warner's former Bravo hit show "Work Out,"
*NEXT*
Channel 6: Zubaida appa and Agha sahab telling home remedies to cure obesity
*SWITCHED OFF*
uuurrrghhh...
i was thinking about this current trend *well not so current* of anti-curves zero size haul that is getting viral...
i had read a lot on nutrition, balanced diet and the body types...and for me being healthy is beauty...
But...considering the current frame of mind of our youth *and some so called modern aunties* beauty means bones :P *can relate this to one of my personal experience lol*

so...
i am contributing my voice against it :D *kinda protest* and i want the world to know the benefits of being fat (Y)

~ You don't waste time or money at the gym
~ You ride lavishly every single time.the front seat is always yours, no questions asked, making a more comfortable ride for everyone :D also, people are less like to sit next to you on public transport...hence making ur travelling comfortable :P
~ Eat whatever you want :P *ur already fat what more u can get lol*
~ Eat whenever you want *since ur fat n timings r not a considerate thing for u :P *
~ You can wear hilarious apparel :D or any apparel u wear cab be hilarious :D
~ You stay warm throughout winter :D Hail to those extra layers around you :P we pity our skinny folks who get cold very easily because they lack natural insulation :D
~ Be your own bodyguard (Y) one of the most convincing things about being fat is having some substance.... we're not gonna blow away when anyone punches us on the arm it doesn’t hurt :D moreover we're harder to kidnap :P
~ Big people are more huggable...teddy hugs r love <3 we're human pillow!!  we get lots of people want to hug us, and we're always up for a good snuggling!! LOL
~ If there's any remaining food at the table, people will ALWAYS offer it to you :D isn't it awesome? :D
~ In my opinion and contrary to popular belief clothing look better with curves stretching them out ;) <3 *my self obsession lol*
~ All those studies that show we’re less likely to die from chronic illnesses, infections, invasive procedures etc are greatly appreciated :P plus we have no fear to die due to starving :P this make life risks negative :P
~ We make excellent life drawing subjects and a substancial matter for art and entertainment :D a social service for making people happy ;)
~ Extra cushioning (Y) cats and children both like sitting on us cause we're soft ;)
~ More body for tatto...n for body arts :P
~ Not only we take up more physical space but more metaphorical space as well :D easy to notice...dominating trait of catching eyes :D ..after al size matters ;)
~ Fat is fun to play with hahahahha :D try to slap ur own thighs for creating badass music :P
~ Ur back doesn’t get sore when bike riding coz u have ur own inbuilt cushioned seat. WHEEEEE!
~ We’re so lucky ladies :D coz fat people don’t get wrinkles ^_^ we flesh ‘em out!
~ Plus point for shopaholics as no size fits :D this saves money..also coz you have to try on everything you like the look of in a clothes shop to make sure it fits :D it’s an excuse to spend hours shopping :D
~ We carry a personal portable table with us :D while sitting we can use the space between belly and thigh like an extra hand LOL items u tuck there stay put and u just have to remove them before u stand up (Y) bio-furniture i guess :D
~ We're blessed with the protection of FILTER :) thanks to our body fat for which we never attarcts the ones who would just care about a person's body and face as an instrument for satisfaction and would never be interested in going beyond and considering other type of values But being fat has attracted the right people :) and has kept the shallow ones away :P
~ Another one...our laughs are incomparable :) thy r thick, warm and genuine :) *smile*
~ We're much more resilient than our thinner mates (Y) thy can’t take it man while we do for real!!
~ And yes i love how easy we float in the pool :D

so be a proud FATSO and have confidence in urself not in ur looks ;)
and i'll summerize this all in one line;

Allah made us very precious
and so we're protected by air bags around us :D
that prevent us from damage
and keep us safe ;)
Be thankful!
stay happy, stay FAT, stay blessed!!!

P.S:
plus points mentioned above are not fictitious :P any resemblance to living or dead should be considered as support not a co-incidence :D

~ Winter is Love ~

I always wonder, why people prefer summers over winter?
or spring over autumn?
and why they link loneliness with December?
In order to get an answer i tried to find out the connection between chills and cold with hurt, broken, sad, being left... n the list goes on...
I remember writing a short picture piece for winter (shared here) and that too had portrayed the phenomenal sadness for which winter is famous for..loneliness accompanied by sadness..
I re-checked the learned-n-turned chapters of my life and tried to be sure if i ever have felt this way...
i tried over n over again and what i come up with was this statement...

'winter is love'

All the memories i had with the winter are the ones that bring back an ear to ear smile on my face rather than even a fraction of sadness...
whether its shivering with chills while taking a crazy ride on bike with my brother...
or going out at 12 am just to have Agha ka Falooda and enjoying it at a roadside chair...
from walking bare-feet at sea-side under full bright moon in cold breeze...
to doing gossip with mom dad while being in blanket and having peanuts...
it was, spending a night under the sky while sitting around the bonfire...
or the weekend overnight BBQ with all the cousins...spent with teasing and cracking jokes on each other..
a hot cup of creamy cappuccino when curled up in sofa and watching the season of my favourite show...
or being confused between listening songs n tuning to late night radio shows while lying in bed...
from enjoying the sleep at its max for having extra hours in winters...
to the shortened days for minimal energy consumption lol..
from hot steamy baths to loaded bowls of chicken corn soup...
from midnight cravings for ice-cream to late night walks on the empty street...
from the woolen warm fabric to the trendy chick hoodies...
from turning into cloud-breathing dragons...to having electrical sparky hairs....
winter has its own essence...
its own addiction...
and this mesmerizing capability of winter always...yes i mean it...always make me fall in love with the winter...all over again!!
for me..
winter is all fun...
winter is all smile...
winter is all care...
and yes...
winter is all love...

The Infant Tsunami :D

One fine morning the staff of the hospital was alarmed to be ready for the expected emergency, operation combat tsunami indeed. It was 21st of April, a day which was previously known for the death anniversary of a great poet, poet of the East, Dr. Allama Iqbal. But when the same day became my birth day, since then, it is too known by my family for the day when they were blessed to have a baby tsunami :D yeah fellas thats me :P
Doctors who operated my mom said they never had seen a 7 kg weighted baby who born 'LIKE A BOSS' having killer macho attitude like Arnold Schwarzenegger and boisterous tone with confidence of lady Gaga. According to the initial physical examination i was labelled as GIRL but later psychological tests proved it wrong :D My mom was proud of having a baby HULK as my other cousins, who were of same age, always looked like, the beauty used to look with the beast :D

'This made me realize the power of being big'

Brought up in that environment gave rise to the inborn 'gangsta' in me. Most of the times people refused to accept that I'm just 2 year old as i looked like that of 4. Soon my proud mom became demure and ashamed of being a mother of physically stout, sexually girl, psychologically boy and mentally alienate sort of specie :P but nothing and no one could have stopped me. Walking like a lioness in the entire house, followed by a group of cousins, ensures me that I'm the ultimate God-Father of this planet earth. Whenever any of my follower deny to obey me i just gave them a killer stare and things
never remained same. As i grew more and more everyone started to get worried about my weight that was expanding like the US invasions. And maybe that similarity in expansion rate is the only reason I was adopting its characteristics of being more and more dominating, cunning, blunt and violent :D

Till the age of 2.5 years I was honored by my circle with the title of 'baby stunna' not because my mom dad bought that much cool stuff for me but for the fact that whenever i saw something cool and liked it, I exchange it according to the Barter System. I gave him/her a punch on face, fingerprint on cheek, kick on the ass or pat at the back and take that thing in return :D

Things might have gone in the same way but then the time to get admission at the school arrived. The time that changed my life from being Infant tsunami to someone else. What was that? How it changed me? Will surely update you some day :P

Stay tuned :D

existence of - Love at first sight

“Those true eyes too pure and too honest in aught to disguise the sweet soul shining through them.”

Is there a thing called love at first sight?
It’s a question I asked in the deep of night.

Then I met you, the love of my life
In just a moment I knew that our love would be true.

I knew it was right under the full moonlight
And I had my answer; I had found love at first sight!

― Owen Meredith

Above line was quoted by one of my friend while we were arguing about the existence of 'love at first sight'. I used to agree with the Bernard Shaw's statement that 'love at first sight is little foolishness but a lot of curiosity' but she said it is the feeling like you’ve found the one you’re looking for and realizing this with the shine in your eyes will made him/her go breathless too. I asked, ‘you mean to say we only can love a person at first sight? She replied, ‘NO. It can be a person, a place, a thing or even something u can’t explain’. Meanwhile I was thinking about the ways it is defended by its believers that always made me wonder whether it’s true or make-believe approach? Or just a mental condition where something’s or someone’s charisma enchant you that you’re unable to resist?
So I started recalling my past and discussing the moments with her, when I saw something or someone for the first time and felt lost. Getting back and back in the deep ocean of recollections, I stopped at the memory of my first love, I guess. It was my doll house. I still remember the day I was passing by a toys shop and it was on the display. Oh My God it was like a dream house to me. I get back home, told my mom dad about it and started begging for it and I was so stubborn that I didn’t stop pleading until I get that. Was it my first love? If anyone had asked me then, then definitely that my answer would be YES. But it was a matter of few months I get bored of it. Can anyone get bore from his/her first love? Asking myself and denying that it wasn’t my love, in fact it was just a fascinating toy!
Hmmthen was Kate Winslet my first love? She’s pretty like a princess and I was impressed by her when I saw her performance in the movie ‘Titanic’. Still whenever I saw that movie she leaves me with an overwhelming feeling of falling in love with her. But do I care enough about watching her in other movies? According to the definitions, Love is to think about and to keep on wanting to look at someone you love. So my answer is a big ‘NO’.
What is my first love then? My dogs? Yeah I accept I care for them, like to be with them, they’re fun to be around. The moment I saw them when my brother gifted me those pets, I was excited! Not breathless! They were cute like clouds (since they both are white :) ) soft as teddies, witty as Chuck Norris, playful as a baby and we soon became best friend. Does this make them my first love? Let me think. At times I get irritated by their playfulness, they annoy a lot by creating mess everywhere, start barking loud while I’m in between a conversation on call that pissed me off and I often plan to kick them out. This shouldn’t be the love.
I concluded it all and firmly admitted in front of her with the rock-hard confidence, ‘I’m sure I have not loved anyone or anything at the first sight dear. If it do exist then why I haven’t experienced it yet? Can you explain it to me?’ She stared at me get closer and asked weirdly, ‘What was the first thing you saw?’ I said, ‘when?’ She keeps on looking to my eyes and said in the mysterious tone, ‘since you remember. The very first sight you remember. What was it? I got blank for a moment and suddenly something flashed back. My very first memory reflected in my mind. The one for which I feel blessed and lucky to have. The one that made me who am I today. The one with which I can never get annoy, irritated, pissed off. The one I can never forget and will never stop needing it. The one I do care about every single moment. Yes it was the memory of my first love. The love I fell for at the very first sight. How can I forget the very first sensual touch of trembling hands? The very first shaky voice I heard, ‘that’s my girl, my little princess’.
My shoulders dropped down for once and then they get mounted again with pride. She was observing it all. She passed me a smiled and asked again, ‘Do you still believe that love at first sight doesn’t exist?’

I replied with tears in my eyes but a glowing smile on my face, ‘It does!’

tragedy of being a candle

and she free her heart from all agony, pain and hurt of being left...
the moment she heard that voice...
that mesmerizing voice...that acted like a voodoo before..and yet again..
she was possessed with the humility and largeness of spirit and soul to do either herself high n happy or to save others...each n everyself...except her ownself... 
and she was afraid of her own eyes...one view...just one view will ruin the barriers she's keeping to break the flow of the storm inside...
but she wasn't blind enough to foresee...
destruction of that barrier would have cost lives....lives of her loved ones...and pride of him somehow...the ones who owe her big time...and the one she cares for...
and thus she declared 'forgiveness'...
forgiveness to be given for past and taken for the future...
And then she prayed for his wholeness......
his happiness...without her...
she seek Allah's help for it...and made a deal of letting him go..not at a cost of her own happiness...but for lives of people she owes...
and to trade back his smile...to be shared with someone else...with those enchanting shinning eyes laid upon another self...except her ownself!!
She murmed...
not a bad deal at all....
how can be making all smile be a bad deal?
although she know...he will be taking this as humiliation rather than humility...
as betrayal rather than fidelity...
But...Allah is watching it all...
she cried and said:
O'Allah...u can see whats inside my heart...you can see it well...
you know the fairness of deal Allah...
don't let me fail in it...its like risking everything...
or do i got anything to risk?
yes...
happiness of the ones i care for...each n every self...except her own self!!

Note to all the readers ;)

the moment when every single piece of ur written word is considered as ur own story or ur own perception *sigh* like seriously? people get to knw what writer writes can depict someone, can be on someone else's behalf, an inspiration, an observation or anything...and if it is the matter of fact then y in the world thy don't believe what was/is said directly to them in the first place than the words for anonymously whom it may concerns 

*in response to the repeated over-rated supposition and self-proclaimataions of what i write is exactly what i believe or gone through  

the saga of cruel life - contribution to 'blame the victim society' !!

she knew it...
she indeed knew it very well...
she knew that all her humility will be counted as humiliation...
her fidelity taken as betrayal..
her sincerity considered as falsehood...
her love mistaken as animosity....
the saddened thoughts embraced her mind...
yet another defeat...another loss...
her heart clenched...and she tried to know what exactly it is?
how one cannot be considerate over the measures preventing massacre and can take it as setting back??
she was once again knocked...even hardly than before...
why?
why Allah?
why one can't see what i'm getting through? why one can't feel anything at all? why it is happening to me again?
she cried...
how one can dwell over one's own words like this?
mentioning to have not a single reason for the slaying of other in one moment and in the other moment marking the other equally responsible for the damage?
and percieve it as the cause of comfort for the other one in first place?
she wondered if anyone can see her heart...her dying heart...
how can she open her heart to anyone?
how can she make anyone see whats inside it?
She bent down in sujood, sobbed and mourned..
NO...THATS NOT TRUE..ALLAH YOU KNOW IT ALL RIGHT..O'ALLAH PLEASE DON'T LET ANYONE MISTAKEN MY INTENTIONS OR ME WITH THIS BRUTALITY..
she never wanted to mention this ever...but she felt the need of it..
and she adrressed to em..
hit me...come...kill me...throw bricks at me...
and you will never be hit back with the same but always with love and wishes...
and she decided she will take all the bricks..will let them hit her...bruise her...and she will carry all those scars proudly on her face...forever!!
and...
no matter how one will keep her as a memory...she will not try to open her heart ever again...will not say a word to clear herself...will not try to prove anything at all...she will keep it all locked in her heart now...she's agreived...she's contused...her heart ache with the illusions she saw...
and she knew she will never be same again..ever...

surrendered submission to the saviors

....all of it was coming to an end now...
her dark numb mind was regaining the ability to feel that ongoing spontaneous chronic pain...
she tried to recall, how i get here?
you were shot...hit with brutality...smashed cruelly...and was left to die...she was told..
she tried to look around to find him but saw none else but herself...all bruised..blue..his favourite color...she remembered...
suddenly she felt if someone is cutting out small pieces of her flesh with a pointed sharpened knife...continously..
keeping her drowned in her own blood...red...her favourite color...
not killing her at all...in a single attempt...
infact,
keeping her alive to taste the soreness...and to endure it in conciousness...
she asked, is this a torture?
no...
they say its a treatment!
to drain out the poisoned blood out of her so that her dead heart can be detoxified...so that it can be alive again...
able to pump the fresh, naive blood to her face..to make ur cheeks flushed with life once again...
Why?
Do they really feel she want to live again?
and they think that she will ever wish to experience the journey of life...the phenomena of living it again?
coz if they are trying to make it happen, it shows they want her to do it all over again...
to believe in it again...to live it again...to get through it again...
But did any of them know if she want to do it again?
to start a new journey..another attempt for survival..with a new companion...on an unfamiliar road...
she shouted...No I don't!!
How can I? How will I?
and they say: you've to...this is how you should live...try it out with a different companion who can guard you well...who can take care of ur broken fragile heart...and not all the journies end like this...not all the travellers face the betrayals...not all die an un-natural death...
she turned and asked: you guarantee?
they stayed quite...and said: we had seen u dying...you were dead...we brought you back to life...we guarded you throughout your recovery...
you think i'm recovered? she asked...
you will...they say...
she asked: then y not the attempt for that same road i'm well familiar with? where i had seen the green blooming fields too among the deadly thunders....but i had witnessed the existence of spring too...though rare w.r.t the frozen heartless winters...why not that road again? ...
now can you guarantee that will not be repeated? you will not be shot and left to die again? answer us...who was there when u were dying a tragedic death? him?..haven't you already tried to reach ur destiny through that road by attempting it again n again? wht u got everytime? hurt and pain...and most of all who brought u back to life? so be fair and say who owe to choose ur roads nw?
and her mind flashed back with all the attempts she had made that ended in vain...
she felt the pain...the stabs...the hurt...
and she realized no she no more own herself...and she know... her heart is pumping no more....her cheeks are no more flushed....
her mind fell somewhere in the darkness...
all frozen...all numb...all defeated...her soul left the residue of her body behind..and..
she surrendered to her saviors!!